One of the starting responses we see is that of the mother who has developed what family therapists call "emotional dull" (Nichols and Schwartz 43). She has become cold, withdrawn from her live on son Conrad (Buck had been her favorite), and at multiplication be seduces in an actively hostile manner both to him and to her married man.
Murray Bowen 1 of the pioneers of family therapy, would explain Beth's reaction as "emotional cutoff" a term for flight from an unre rund emotional attachment (Peterson and Nisenholz 224). In Beth's case, her unresolved emotional attachment appears to involve both her surviving son, Conrad, and her older son Buck. Regarding Buck, she appears not to have act upt with her grief (her husband notes that neither she nor Conrad cried at the funeral) or with the fact that she blames her son Conrad for the decease of Buck who was her favorite).
Regarding her unresolved feelings for Conrad, in addition to the blame (which Conrad has internalized) Beth appears to have projected onto him her own sense of emotional need because she can't deal with being needy; further, as is often the case with projection, she seems to actively dislike her son for that very quality. In the word picture, she describes Conrad as the case who says, "I got an A on my test; Love me," and explains to
Nichols, M.P., and R.C. Schwartz. Family therapy: Concepts and methods. 4th ed. Boston: Allyn & Bacon, 1998.
When the serious and itchy psychoemotional realities ar brought up, there is very little attempt to take heed to one another and attempt to resolve the issue. Rather, there is alone anger and blame and a persistent defensiveness on the part of both Conrad and his mother. Calvin is open to communication but, perhaps because of long historic period of practice in avoiding meaningful discussions to maintain the family myth, he is not very good at it.
Calvin, Conrad's father, is the only family member who dust emotionally open.
However, he seems confused and befuddled as to the psychoemotional and behavioural dynamics of the family, findings himself increasingly caught between his wife and his son---both of whom show a proclivity for talking about things that don't matter and avoiding any and all discussion of their real feelings. It is within this family environment, that both the book and the movie tell the story of Conrad's attempts to deal with the guilt he feels later on his brother's death by seeing a psychiatrist.
Both running(a) and dysfunctional families experience conflicts, challenges, and tragedies. However, according to Satir (Peterson and Nisenholz 225) the difference is that functional families are leave aloneing to listen to one another, consider each other's imply of view and make compromises in order to meet each other's needs. Dysfunctional families are unwilling to accomplish this.
Conrad's mother gets infuriate at her husband Calvin because he mentioned at a party that his son was seeing a psychiatrist, a violation of the myth. Also, they all appear to believe that even if everything is not fine, you try to solve it within yourself and/or the family so that no one will ever know that there has been a period of melodic line or strain; essentially, this is what Conrad's mother angrily says to Calvin when he suggests that as a family they all attend
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